I never could get the hang of Thursdays.

Ariel's learning how to drive. She spent a lot of today out with Mom and Dad learning to drive.

We also watched the Madame de Pompadour episode of Doctor Who. It's really quite a sad episode.

I played some piano while the rest of my family was out, which was nice to be able to do. I need to practice the violin some more, but I really hate practicing when other people can hear me. It's just so embarrassing.

Tonight Dad took Ariel and I out shopping for Christmas, which turned into trying to find buisness-y clothes for me for my upcoming accounting and professional... stuff. Nice business clothes are expensive! I'm going to have to work very hard to be a good accountant - there's no point in having promotable clothes without promotable skills!

I miss Sirius Black. Today marks one week since I've seen him, and I miss him a lot. I miss the way I feel around him. I miss the perspective he has on life. I'm realizing how good he is at making the most of what he has. Many people take a look at what they have and moan and groan about it and expect that there's nothing they can do to improve it. Sirius Black is the opposite. I can't recall if I've ever heard him complain about anything, and he's a firm believer in his own power to make things what he wants them to be. He makes me feel like I can, if I work hard enough, make my life anything I want it to be, and that's very empowering. It's especially helpful for me when it comes to working out and eating right. I feel like the mainstream way is to take a passive approach to our bodies and to think that if they're not perfect now, there's no way they ever will be. Sirius Black doesn't believe that. He almost seems like he's constantly at war with his own body, fighting to make it better than it is. I guess that's Sirius Black's main thing that I'm trying to get at here. He's never content with himself; he's always working hard to make himself better. He doesn't try to fix other people. He fixes himself. And all without complaint. He's amazing.

Sirius Black is also a big Douglas Adams fan. He's love the title of today's post. :)

Up to Speed

Why hello, blog. I'm glad to see you've survived this new period of neglect.

During the second half of the semester, I studied a lot. Also it got cold. I'm not going to try and describe all that happened, I'll just bring you up to speed on everything you need to know to keep up with updates from now on. Time for the seven aspects of life.

Mental: I loved my Accounting class and got an A in it. Hooray! Still planning on majoring in Accounting.

Social: I did do some social things in addition to studying. Just not many.

Financial: We'll see about that when final grades are posted.

Familial: Missed my family a ton while I was at school. Now that I'm back home for Christmas break, I'm super glad to be with them. They're the best.

Spiritual: Pretty great; just wish I had time to write all the things I want to.

Physical: Started working out, then stopped when finals came around and need to get back into the swing of that.

Romantical: Ah, the category I know we've all been waiting for.  Let's just summarize the boys in my life. Aladdin is still dating Padme, and I still think it's a bad idea but don't really care. Mr. Bingley is generally nice but keeps driving up the walls crazy. Rudolph got back from his mission and gave me a call, but no romance there to worry about - thank goodness! Haven't seen or heard from Edward Cullen in months and really don't mind at all. Saw Macbeth a couple times, but I think there are no more worries there, either. Beat Faramir on our math final, which I am thrilled about, and am not interested in anything with him. Everyone and their mom has a crush on Cedric Diggory. And Sirius Black is pretty amazing. I've dated Sirius Black quite a bit and I really like him. He seems to like me too, and I'm just thrilled. I won't gush too much about him on here, but he's just really wonderful.

Besides all that, I had a sucessful NaNoWriMo and finished the first book in the Edelweiss Pirates series. It needs tons of revision and stuff, but I got the word requirement down. I think it's actually not too bad of a book.

I've watched New Girl and some more Doctor Who; Ariel and I are planning on much more Doctor Who now that she's on break.

Season two of Sherlock is coming out in the UK soon and I'm dying with excitement and hoping I'll find a way to see it. Also the first trailer for the Hobbit came out. Basically all the Martin Freeman fangirls are dying.

I'm going to post more in the coming year. Goals for next year are:

Run 10 miles a week or more.
Blog twice a week or more.
Make a video once a month or more.
Read scriptures every day.
Have personal prayer three times a day.
Write a story, no matter how short or unoriginal, every month.

I'll keep track of the miles run and stories written on this blog, and it should be pretty obvious on this blog how often I'm blogging. Videos will be available here.

Let's hope I can do it!

Socializing and No Studying

I think I could be arrested for blog neglect.

These past two weeks have been absurdly busy: filled with tests, quizzes, papers, conferences, and homework. They haven't involved any laundry, though, which is going to be a really big problem in about two days.

I've gotten a lot closer with a lot of the girls in my floor; my room is basically the nutrition study room and a place where people just drop by and say hi. I love it. We really need to vacuum though. Ever since Nikki and I got sick last week our room has been in various states of disarray.

Nikki and Caroline and I were talking about boys over the weekend, and after seeing Mr. Bingley and I interact, they decided that they wanted us to get married. I gagged. (Did I mention Mr. Bingley's finally dating the girl he's been flirting with since before 'Nam? Cause he is.) But after more discussion about boys, they decided that they really like Sirius Black. It was a thoroughly unproductive night. :)

Last night I went to WalMart with George McFly (Mr. Bingley's roommate) and Dr. Baltar. It was actually quite fun. We shopped, then got donuts at Krispy Kremes because the "Hot Now" sign was on. Then Dr. Baltar and I went back to his place and watched My Little Pony, which was actually quite amusing. Then Sirius Black and I went on a walk, which was wonderful. We talked a lot and he put up with how freezing I got since it was so cold. He's a great guy.

I have a math test on Friday. It's not going to go well. I think it's ridiculous that we're not allowed calculators for statistics, matricies, etc. A course designed for business majors should allow calculators. Gah. It's ridiculous. I'm peeved.

I've started eating lunch with Renee and Mr. Bingley every Monday and Wednesday. I quite like it! They're great people. As I've gotten to know Renee more, I think more and more that she and Dr. Baltar would make a great couple. If Dr. Baltar lets me, I'd like to set them up after he's back from his mission.

Time to go eat lunch!

Spectacular

Tonight I went to the BYU Homecoming Spectacular with Dr. Balthar and Allyson. (Did I mention that Dr. Balthar and I are good friends again? We are.) It was absolutely incredible. Brian Stokes Mitchell performed, and HOLY COW can he sing. This is what he sounds like:

The orchestra also made one of my life dreams come true. I've always wanted to hear Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture played live, and tonight I did. It was breathtaking. My heart was racing the entire time, it was so brilliant. Definitely the highlight of the night.

In other news, it snowed today. Mostly just freezing rain, but there was definitely snow falling at a couple points. It made the mountains look really cool today.

New boy codenames to introduce are Edward Cullen, Sirius Black, Macbeth and Faramir.

And now I'm too tired to write more. I'll write more stuff later.

What JK Rowling Taught Me About God

One of the core principles of my religion (and I think most others) is faith. We are to have faith in God, in His mercy, His plan for us, and that everything will work out.
Believing that everything will be okay is one of the biggest leaps of faith that we take. There's no way to rationally come to the same conclusion that faith brings us to, like there is with some other things. We can observe that if we follow the Word of Wisdom, we are healthier. The benefits of kindness, honesty, scripture study and prayer upon our lives are to some extent measurable and trackable. But faith that all will be well in the end doesn't work the same way. There's always another end ahead of us, one that reason cannot guarantee will be okay. The only assurance we have of a happy ending is our faith.
Faith is not easy for many. I'm lucky. For me it is easy. I was reflecting about that this morning, and I realized that one of the things I have to thank for that is Harry Potter.
I'm a big fan of finding the religious symbolism in wholesome entertainment, and since I'm such a Harry Potter nut, I've thought about the religious themes in Harry Potter. But my connection today did not come from the story of Harry Potter, but the story of all the fans who read Harry Potter.
I picked up the first Harry Potter book when I was eight. I quickly fell in love with Hogwarts, with Harry, Ron, Hermione, Fred, George, Dumbledore, McGonagall, and everything about the Harry Potter universe. As I tore through the second and third books, I loved them and the characters more than ever.
And then I read the fourth book. And the fourth book was different. It didn't end happily. Cedric Diggory, the brave, kind, loyal, innocent Hufflepuff was unceremoniously reduced to "spare" and slaughtered. Harry failed to do what all the books so far had been about - preventing the return of the most evil wizard of all time, Lord Voldemort. Lord Voldemort was powerful once more, and intended to take over the world again. The Ministry of Magic was too afraid to face the truth, and buried its head in the sand. Sure, the parting words "What would come would come, and when it did, they would meet it with all of their courage" were nice, but they weren't assuring. They were the words of a fourteen year-old boy trying to be brave in the face of the most terrifying war his kind had ever seen, a war that he would have to lead. One thing that was very clear at the end of the fourth book was that we had absolutely no guarantee that everything would be okay in the end.
Then came the wait. I waited two years for Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. In the weeks leading up to the book's release, I remember one spoiler that stood out to me, and the rest of the fandom, more than anything else: a major character would be dying. We were assured before we even read the book that no one was safe. We felt Harry's fear for his loved ones, for we had no more assurance of their safety than he did. JK Rowling taught us about the true horror of war that way: she showed us that war does not only kill the bad guys or the extras. War takes the innocent, the charming, the ones we love, along with the ones we've never met and the ones we loathe.
Sirius's death in the Order of the Phoenix was tragic. It was the first time in the series that Harry lost someone who was very close to him. Once again, the only father figure that Harry knew was gone. Readers again closed the book knowing that things had only gotten worse: Voldemort's power had gone, the Ministry was impeding the Order's fight against Voldemort, Sirius was dead, and the prophecy declared that "neither can live while the other survives".
Things didn't look good, and the fandom knew it. Editorials and theories about which characters would die ran rampant, and no character was safe. Each book had grown darker, and the death toll higher. It was after the Order of the Phoenix, while we waited two more years for the Half-Blood Prince, that many of us realized that losing Harry was definitely a possibility for the last book. The hero wasn't safe; the prophecy had made that clear. Harry was as vulnerable to death as anyone else.
It was in Half-Blood Prince that the trio started to scan the newspapers for deaths of people they knew. The book was littered with deaths of characters we knew, or had heard of all through the series. When it seemed the death and destruction couldn't get any more real, it did. Dumbledore was killed. The students of Hogwarts, the Order of the Phoenix and the readers had viewed Dumbledore as untouchable, indispensable, and had thought that he would always be around. But he was gone. The chances of a happy ending for Harry were dwindling - so many he loved had died, and he still had so much to do. On top of that, the "Harry will die" camp took further support from the theory that Harry was a horcrux. Hope seemed ever dimmer.
We waited another two years - perhaps the longest two we'd ever waited - for the final installment of Harry Potter. The Deathly Hallows represented all our hopes for a happy ending and all our fears for a sad one. No one was dissatisfied. The book was heartbreaking, filled with tragic deaths of characters we loved. Harry himself died. All the true horror of war was shown. But with the true horror of war, JK Rowling showed us that she truly had been planning for this series for almost twenty years and seven books. We finally recognized the important things from Sorcerer's Stone and Chamber of Secrets, the seemingly little things, that were oh so important in the end. The series had a joyful ending, and the ending words, "All was well," could not have been more fitting.
We quickly realized that the Harry Potter series was a work of genius. No one could have written that without a tremendous amount of effort, and planning. We realized that JK Rowling had the entire thing mapped out before we even read the first book, and that she, the omnipotent author of all things Harry Potter, had been carefully guiding the characters along to their happiest ending.
JK Rowling taught a generation that the best authors know what's going to happen in the end, and are carefully guiding their stories to the ending they have planned. She taught us that even when things seem like they can't get better, the author has a plan for how it will all work out in the end.
I'm not saying that JK Rowling is God. Definitely not. She is a mortal, imperfect like the rest of us. But she managed to convey a characteristic of God to a generation, and that's not nothing.
There's a reason that we call God "The Author of All". Like JK Rowling to Harry Potter, God has a plan for us, and carefully guides us to the ending that we can't envision, but he can. Sometimes things seem so awful that we can't see how they could possibly get better. But the Author of All can. Many times it hurts, and it's terrifying, but it's necessary. JK Rowling carefully guided Harry not only to safety, but to joy. God will do the same for His children.
JK Rowling has taught me many things of eternal significance, but I think that the most important thing she taught me was to have faith in the Author.
Thank you, JK Rowling.

So I Watched Doomsday...

Things on the Brain

I have fifteen minutes until class, so this is basically gonna be a stream of consciousness blog.

Tchaikovsky is a god. There is no other way to put it. I am such a Tchaikovsky fangirl.

Mr. Perfect (a boy I met here who is basically perfect, hence the name) was supposedly at the Cannon Center today, but I didn't see him. I actually haven't seen him since we met. I've formally given  up on him, though I must admit that if I see him again, I'll un-give-up-on-him.

Mr. Bingley and I are going to pull a hilarious prank tonight. I'm excited for it.

And that's all I've got time for now.

Starting at BYU

There's a very good reason that I haven't blogged in almost a month: I started college. And I've been crazy busy trying to get adjusted to that.

I did a pre-fall-semester Honors program called Late Summer Honors. About 150 of us incoming freshman participated, and we all took a week-long class that got us one credit hour of honors credit. I took a class called The Mathematics of Secrecy, where we learned how to use math to break codes. It was quite interesting and I really liked it.

I'm living in Helaman Halls now. My roommate, Nikki, is from Portland, Oregon, and we're fantastic roommates. Portland and Boulder are basically twin cities when it comes to hippie-ness, environmentalism and general weirdness. We have the same level of tidyness, basically the same sleeping schedule (or semblance of one), and we both study quite a bit. We get along really well, and I really like her.

I went to New Student Orientation, which was fine. We've been put into "peer mentoring groups" based on our freshman bundle, so mine is full of kids in my Honors American Heritage class. They seem nice. We did a bunch of tours of campus and stuff, which wasn't very interesting, since I had done all that with Late Summer Honors. I did hike the Y as part of NSO, which was quite fun.

My classes are great. American Heritage Honors is quite interesting, and I'm lucky to be in an honors class with about 40 people, rather than the non-honors American Heritage classes, which have hundreds of people. Last night I read a talk by Elder Dallin H. Oaks about religious freedom in government for the class, and it was absolutely fantastic. I love how everything is taught here in a religious context and how religious insight augments our understanding of what we're learning.

I'm also taking a class called Great Works in Science. I haven't been to it yet, since I added it on Tuesday and it only meets on Mondays, but it looks quite interesting and I'm very excited for it.

My Honors Book of Mormon class is great. I still can't believe that reading the Book of Mormon is a school-required thing; it's really nice! Sarah Katherine is in that class, and it's nice to have someone I know in there.

Accounting 200 is really interesting. People keep laughing at me when I say that, but I'm really enjoying accounting. I think what we do - interpreting data, basically - is fascinating and loads of fun. That's my biggest class, with 600 people.

I also have Finite Mathematics, a course designed for and now required for all business majors. So far it's pretty easy, but we'll see how it progresses.

The girls on my floor are all really nice and I really like them. The food is fantastic. My feet hurt from walking so much. Everyone here is really accomplished and attractive and nice.

And I'll try to blog more often now. :)

Things About Today Worth Mentioning

Went furniture shopping
Got idea for a project
Worked out
Read fantastic Martin/Molly Cabin Pressure/Sherlock crossover fic
Watched Benedict Cumberbatch's The Rattigan Enigma

Furniture Shopping

Is pretty much all I did today. Also had fun on tumblr. And was terrified of a lizard that is lurking somewhere in this apartment.

Back in Louisiana

Feeling rather horrible today. Today we drove from Dallas to Louisiana, finished listening to Cabin Pressure, shopped for furniture, and dropped a ton of stuff off at the new house. Now we're busy trying to decide on furniture and paint for the new house. Woohoo. I have a headache, a backache, a neckache, a stomachache, I'm getting temperature swings and keep blacking out. Time to go curl up and watch Doctor Who.

Driving Day

We drove from Colorado to Dallas, Texas, and are now in a hotel. I'm tired. In the car we listened to music and John Finnemore's Cabin Pressure, which is absolutely fantastic. Now it's time for sleep.

Moving Day

Today was completely exhausting because we moved a ton of stuff. I also got to see Olivia for a bit and go to dinner with Hannah, which was very nice. We're staying in a hotel tonight and then we're off to LA in the morning.

Blog Every Day In August?

"I think I want to try doing BEDA this year."
"But Moriah, you haven't updated your blog in an entire month, And all summer you've been horrible about posting."
"... Your point?"

Right. Conversations with myself aside, I really am going to try to blog every day in August. Even though I rather suck at this blogging thing. But I guess I'll begin by summarizing my summer so far.

Things I've Done This Summer
1. Watched Doctor Who - I've been putting off watching the last Rose episode for about a month now. I just don't want her to go!
2. Become addicted to tumblr - it's where I do my best fangirling, particularly of Sherlock. The Sherlock fandom on tumblr is ridiculously cracky, and I love it.
3. Been bored in Louisiana a lot - especially with Ariel gone to StarTalk at BYU.
4. Blitzkrieg'd a drive from Louisiana to Colorado in 17 hours with my mom and my college stuff - we took turns driving, listened to a lot of Cabin Pressure, and studied for my Music 101 final.
5. Painted Ariel's and my rooms in the Colorado house with Mr. Bingley and my mom - the upstairs of the Colorado house is now an homage to beige.
6. Ate a lot of Qdoba - Mom's become particularly fond of the vegetarian burritos.
7. Went to Lowe's a lot - usually for painter's tape.
8. Deathly Hallows Part 2 Midnight Premiere - went with a bunch of friends, had loads of fun, sobbed through the whole movie, and loved it.
9. Drove to Utah with Mom - 7.5 hours felt like nothing after doing 17 the week before!
10. Took Music 101 Midterm - did decently.
11. Hung out at BYU with Mom and her old Japanese professor - who is absolutely nuts, in a hilarious sort of way.
12. Picked up Ariel from StarTalk - she had a great time and I'm very glad to have her back.
13. Turned into a real person - when I became a legal adult. Party with extended family was completely nuts, but in a I-think-it-was-fun way. Lots of food.
14. Went to a family reunion - at which I was the oldest cousin of 30, including five babies. Spent a lot of time with Mom's sister's baby girl, Lily, who is the cutest little girl ever.
15. Took Music 101 Final - was frustrating and difficult. Don't know how I did yet.
16. Many fandom explosions - especially Sherlock.
17. Stayed up for a Pottermore account - and was successful.
18. Drove back to Colorado - introduced Ariel to Cabin Pressure.

That has been my summer so far! It's been crazy, hot, busy, hectic, insane, and I've actually quite enjoyed it!

Rawr Online Courses.

I'm supposed to be doing my Music 101 course. But I don't know what to study because there are no instructions and no way to contact the teacher and no other students to talk to. MERG.

So now I'm like: 

My Submission to My Family Newsletter

What I am supposed to be doing: Writing an essay about Baroque concertos and suites for the BYU Independent Study class that I'm taking - Music 101.
What I am actually doing: Writing this Robertson Review entry, with my textbook open next to me, hoping that the essay will write itself.

What I am supposed to be listening to: Bach's Brandenburg Concerto #5 and Orchestra Suite #3
What I am actually listening to: The soundtrack from Battlestar Galactica, because it's that cool.

How I as an almost-legal adult am supposed to feel about Pottermore (JK Rowling's newest project, which was announced this morning): "Oh, cool."
How I actually feel about Pottermore: GAHOHMYGOGGLESNOWAYTHISISTHECO

OLESTTHINGEVEROMGIMGONNADIETHISISSOCOOL *fangirl seizure*


What I'm supposed to say when people ask me if I like Louisiana: "Yeah, it's great, the people are really friendly, and it's so green!" (That is all true, btw.)
What I feel like saying when people ask me if I like Louisiana:


Things I, as a teenage girl, should apparently get excited about: Prom, drugs, getting completely wasted in college, jewelry, Brad Pitt, George Clooney, alcohol, Twilight, tea, Justin Bieber, random raps in the middle of songs, boys who have tons of muscles, Glee, New York City, more alcohol and Matthew MacFayden
This I actually get excited about: BBC Sherlock, Doctor Who, Harry Potter, The fact that The Hobbit stars Martin Freeman and has Benedict Cumberbatch in it, BBC/PBS Mysteries, song with really cool rhythms, Joss Whedon's Firefly, pudding, Simon Woods, really awesome soundtracks, boys who are really smart, David Tennant's nose and smile, Cardiff, did I mention that The Hobbit will be so freaking cool, grammar jokes


Things I should have nightmares about: sharks, grizzly bears, falling, showing up to school in my underwear
Things that I actually have nightmares about: being press-ganged into suicide bombing standardized tests, very powerful and distressed small children in gas masks, snakes, Korihor from the Book of Mormon


Things I should find funny but don't: Primetime TV, blonde jokes
Things I should not find funny but do:


Thing I am supposed to find cute: That talking dog from Up!
Thing I actually find cute: The entire Dr. Harrison/Sophy plot in Cranford

Hours I should be sleeping (according to my family): 9pm-6am
Hours I am actually sleeping: 2:30am-9am (Oh I do love summer)

Things that have happened in my life that do fit into this format: See above
Things that have happened in my life that (until now) did not fit in this format: I registered for classes at BYU, I've been along for the ride for buying a house, I've done laundry and dishes and non-interesting stuff.


Well, I'm off to fight crime, find horcruxes, destroy the ring of power, get the Lamanite guards drunk, lead the human race to a new planet, solve murders, and if I have time after that, I'll write that music essay.

Just Remembered

And now that I've just posted that last post, I've remembered stuff that has happened.

1. Pottermore. I'll post my reflections once we find out what it is.
2. Went to Vicksburg with the family. I'm not a huge fan of historical sites.
3. Watched Daniel Deronda.
4. Watched The Big Bang Theory.
5. Watched Firefly. Definitely like it a lot.
6. Watched March of the Penguins; fell asleep.
7. Watched a documentary on credit card debt.
8. Got laughed at for asking for a veggie burger at a steakhouse.
9. My mother keeps volunteering me for things without asking me and it's really driving me crazy.
10. Signed up for classes at BYU.

Nothing Happens To Me

What can I say? Nothing's been happening. I work on music, I watch
Doctor Who, I kickbox.

Mom and Dad put an offer on a house. Hopefully it works out.

I feel like John Watson, from Sherlock.

"Writing a blog about everything that happens to you will honestly help you."
"Nothing happens to me."

I went for a run in the rain this morning. It felt nice. Now I'm just plugging away at Music essays again, wishing I could be watching Sherlock.

At least I've got my shock blanket here.

Moving

Thursday
We got ready to leave. Did lots of laundry, lots of packing, lots of last-minute stuff. I took a few hours to go on a walk with Olivia, and eventually say goodbye to her. That was a difficult goodbye. I've been trying to stay too busy to think about how much I miss everyone, though.

Friday
Mom and Dad sent Ariel and I out to redeem coupons for free stuff - namely, donuts and chicken sandwiches. It was good to get out of the house and out of the way as they finished packing. Ariel and I got the donuts (they had donuts named after Bismarck!) and sandwiches, and then we bid our house farewell and started driving. I drove the Honda with Ariel, and Mom and Dad took the Toyota. Ariel and I had a good time driving fast, listening to music, chatting, singing to music, and just being silly. We stoppped at a Subway for lunch, continued driving, and finally reached Amarillo, which was really boring. We went out for sushi in Amarillo, which was quite nice (I love tofu curry), and then slept.

Saturday
Same driving arrangements. Departed from Amarillo. Listened to more music. Ariel read articles from Cracked.com to me. More singing, fun-having, etc. We also discussed stories we are writing/wantt to write, one of which is together. It's actually the sequel to the novel that I'm working on and will hopefully finish this summer. We arrived in Dallas. Mom and Dad went to the temple, while Ariel and I hung out at the hotel pool, discussing characters in our stories. Then we went to the Cheesecake Factory, which was many kinds of delicious, and then returned to the hotel and fell asleep.

Sunday
Went to church in Dallas. The ward we attended had a whole lot of young men, and one of them looked like a dark-haired version of Aladdin. He was also really cute - even Ariel thought so! He may have also had an Australian accent, so church was more interesting than usual. After church, the family packed up and departed Dallas, with Dad driving Ariel and Mom driving me. Mom and I listened to the entirety of Handel's Messiah and also most of the The Importance of Being Earnest (yay for YouTube in the car!). We finally arrived in Monroe, and unpacked, ate, unpacked more, and collapsed on our beds, exhausted after so much travel.

Monday
Went house-hunting. Was bored. Very bored. Did not shoot any walls. Went to Wal-Mart. Still bored. Am now blogging. More stuff is due to happen later today. Hopefully it'll be interesting.

Last Days in the 303

Monday
Bolder Boulder! My family and I got up early, drove to Boulder, and ran the Bolder Boulder - one of the biggest 10k races in the world. I ran with Ariel, and we had a good time! Ariel actually goes through the five stages of grief when we run: first she's in denial that we're actually running, and then she gets angry about it, which is kind of funny. Then she'll begin the bargaining ("I'll run the next kilometer if we can walk the next half kilometer!"), and then the grief sets in ("I can't do this, Sam!"). I drag her across the finish line, and then she hits stage five: acceptance. After running the race, we got our food, and I downed about 15oz of free soymilk, which was lovely. Then we walked a long way back to our car, drove home, showered, and Ariel and I watched the first half hour of A Study in Pink with commentary. Then Ariel skedaddled to go out with her friend's family, and I went to a barbecue at my friend Mindy's house, which was wonderful. We sat around, talked, ate so much food that Katie and I got huge food babies, then ate some more, and laughed a lot. Olivia eventually showed up, and we watched How To Train Your Dragon, which Katie absolutely adored. It's a very cute movie. After that, we played through an entire deck of cards in Taboo, which was aboslutely hilarious and strangely Sherlock-related. Then I got lost on the way out of Mindy's neighborhood, and was thankful to have learned my way around Louisville back when I dated Dr. Baltar and Aladdin.

Tuesday
On Tuesday, Ariel and I went to Olivia's house, along with Katie, Mindy, Kelly and Kate for a sushi lunch. I ate enough sushi to shock everyone else (it was really good!), and then we ate more strawberries and ice cream and Nutella. Fantastic way to do lunch. Then we watched the 2005 Pride and Prejudice, which was horrendous. Olivia and Katie have long tried to convince me that 2005's drunken-sailor-Darcy is hotter than 1995's proper-Jew-fro-Darcy, and they have failed. The 2005 version was waaay to short, and the characterization was awful, and the only thing that was better in the 2005 version was how cute Mr. Bingley is. I absolutely adore Simon Woods, though he was better in Cranford, when he didn't have the Edward-Cullen hair. After Pride and Prejudice, we pillow-fought and tickle-fought, and then walked to the park nearby. We hung out there for a while, just talking, swinging, rolling down the grassy hill, throwing grass at each other, and lazing in the sun. Then Mindy took Ariel and I home for a few hours. For dinner, I met Olivia at the grocery store, and we bought dinner and stuff for smores and took them to Katie's house, since Katie has a fire pit. We sat around the fire with Katie and Kate and made smores and talked for a few hours. Olivia had never made proper smores before, so it was time well spent. Then we went back to King Soopers for cheap raspberries for breakfast the next morning, and then spent the night in sleeping bags in my backyard. It was also Olivia's first near-camping experience.

Wednesday
We woke up in the morning, and after rolling around a bit, actually got out of our sleeping bags. We packed up, ate breakfast (berries!), and took turns showering in my shower. We did each others' nails, played the piano and sang songs, and then Mindy, Kelly and Heidi showed up to my house. We went to Qdoba and Chipotle, got our burritos, and took them to the park by my house, where we ate and hung out for a few hours. Then we repaired to my house, drank some juice, and I started throwing stuff in the freezer into a fruit smoothie, which didn't turn out too badly. We talked and watched videos on YouTube for a while, which was lovely. Then my girls had to go, and we said goodbye for a few months - until I come back to Colorado. Ever since then, I've been running around getting ready to, you know, move, in a couple days. Stressful times.

Last Week Happened

Monday
Sherlock Day! Tim, Heidi, Kate, Katie, Tom, Olivia, Allyson, Mindy and Kelly came over to my house to watch all three episodes of BBC Sherlock. We started our day off with a run to Wal-Mart, where we bought enough orange fleece for ten large shock blankets, much to the confusion of the staff helping us there. We then watched A Study in Pink. After a quick run to Noodles & Co., we made the blankets and watched The Blind Banker and The Great Game. So good! Then we ran to King Soopers for dinner and played Chronology, which was lots of fun!

Tuesday
Tuesday was a much more mellow day. I helped my mom figure out her new phone, went for a run, helped clean up the house, and went to my last Mutual activity ever, where we played some board game, ate a cake with our faces on it, and talked a lot.

Wednesday
I drove my mother and sister around to various activities, and then picked Hannah up for the final installment of our Lord of the Rings experience. The Return of the King was absolutely fantastic, and Aragorn is still quite attractive.

Thursday
Ariel aced her last final at Peak to Peak, and we celebrated never having to see the place again. I went to the rec center with Mom and Ariel. I got to bake with Olivia and Katie, which was lovely. We made these chocolate lava cake things - Olivia's idea - and then ran off to get a pair of sunglasses for Olivia before her weekend trip to Moab for kung-fu.

Friday
Went for another run. I wrote my talk for Sacrament Meeting on the meaning of life. There was a block party, so I socialized there for a while, and ate a lot of food. Then I picked up Allyson and took her to my house, and we basically just sat on my couch and talked and laughed for a few hours. It was really nice to spend time with her - I'm so glad we're both going to BYU.

Saturday
I went for a run - again. I also went to a last-supper sort of deal for Tim, because Saturday was his last day in Colorado - he's going to work in Nebraska over the summer. We went to a Thai place, and had a lovely last lunch together. Then Allyson, Kate and I returned to Heidi's house and ended up discussing religion for a few hours with Heidi and her sister. Allyson fell asleep. :) I invited them all to the Mormon dance that night. I dropped Allyson off at her house, and then picked up Tyler. We watched A Study in Scarlet. Then Heidi came by for the Mormon dance, and at the last minute, we decided to invite a set of brothers that we know from school to the dance. Heidi also knows them from running. Ariel says I should call the older one Bill Clinton and the younger one Ralph Nader. They both have strong political opinons, and apparently Bill Clinton does a really good... well, Bill Clinton impression. Anyway, we had a ton of fun at the dance! There was one kid who knew the entire "All the Single Ladies" dance, which was amazing! After we took Bill Clinton and Ralph Nader home from the dance, Bill Clinton told me that a song he had recently written was actually for me, which was really sweet of him. :D

Sunday
My entire family had to speak in Church. Ariel and I spoke about the meaning of life. My mom spoke about prayer, and her talk was really good. My dad spoke about fasting, which was also really good. My dad said the official good-bye to the congregation for us, and I totally felt like we were the VonTrapp family from the Sound of Music. He mentioned that we wouldn't be seeing anyone from the congregation for a long time, and it totally sounded like Captain VonTrapp's speech right before the family runs away after the music festival. A lot of people said they liked our talks, which was good! We then auf-wiedersehen-ed, and had a family meeting where we planned the rest of our week. Then Mr. Bingley came over to watch The Blind Banker, which was good fun. After he left, I went hiking with my family, thus furthering the Sound of Music parallelism.

One pictures is worth a thousand words...

Making this my longest blog post ever. Enjoy!

The End of High School

Wednesday
Cleaned house with Mom, and then went to the Huckleberry with Olivia, Katie, Mindy, Kelly and Allyson. Ran into my crush from freshman year, a guy two grades above me. My friends and I nicknamed him Teddy Bear back when I liked/stalked him. It was strange to see him again and feel absolutely no attraction whatsoever when I used to be so nuts about him. His girlfriend was the type who wore leggings rather than pants.
Picked up Dad from airport in pouring rain. His flight was late, I was late from traffic, and there was a lot of rain.

Thursday
Went to school to check out. Got everything signed off, and then hung out in the counseling lab with other people for a few hours. Signed yearbooks, looked at TVTropes, just sat around and talked. It was lots of fun, except for the part where coffee spilled all over everyone.
Then had Goodbye-Seniors Assembly, where people cried into microphones about how much they loved each other. I played sudoku with Allyson.
Then went to Alumni Barbeque and had the best veggie burger ever. Ran into another ex-crush, had same strange feeling of man-I-definitely-don't-like-you-anymore. My formerly asexual friend came out as gay, and we ate a lot of food.
I went to King Soopers with Hannah and Phoebe and Kelly to buy potatoes for their band prank. 80 lbs of potatoes later, we went to Kelly's house with Olivia, Mindy, Kate and Allyson for a few hours, where we napped, watched YouTube videos, pranked each other and talked more.
After Kelly's house, we headed over to the Senior Night of Reflections, where we ate dinner and then had another open mic thing, part of which involved our parents. Far too many tears all around.

Friday
Went to school at 9 for my third meal at school in a row: the Senior Breakfast. We posed for a picture, ate a lot of food, and then moved into graduation rehearsal. We practiced standing up and sitting down together on command a lot, and it felt like I was back in Primary. Then we went through the tunnel of the entire school giving us high-fives, which spit us out onto the field, where we did more graduation rehearsal. I got sunburned, but enjoyed guessing middle names of everyone with Lucas Horton, Jacob Hilvitz and Tom Hessner (yay alphabetical order).
I then drove Olivia and Katie home, blasting classical music from the car with the windows down. We drove around for a little while, just enjoying the moment. It was very nice.
Then I picked my Mom up, and we played a fun game of yay-we've-been-kicked-out-of-the-house-for-a-showing. We had lunch at Noodles and Company, and then picked Ariel up from school. We spent the rest of our exile at the library, and then returned home, exhausted. Dad and I looked at laptops for school, and our family decided that we will be moving on June 3rd.

Saturday

Woke up and graduated! Made it to school in ridiculous-looking cap and gown, and took another senior class picture. Stood around in lines for a while, waiting to graduate. Finally walked onto field and graduated. Speeches were shorter and funnier than expected (Olivia was valedictorian, so she gave a speech, which left me in stitches). I almost tripped as I left the platform after getting my diploma, but didn't! We threw our hats in the air, and then took a ton of pictures afterwards.
I went to lunch with my family, and then the party-hopping began. Kelly and Mindy and Olivia and I went to Katie's party, socialized a lot there, and then went to our friend Kris's party, which involved a lot of balloons and small children. We then went to our friend Maithreyi's party, and then to my Mormon-kid graduation party. I stayed there, but they left for more parties after a while. I met Mr. Bingley's new girlfriend, who was surprisingly short and very nice. I liked her quite a lot. Then I went home and opened the tons of cards that people gave me for graduation - it's awesome! I got a towel, a toaster-type thing, a bunch of gift cards and lots of candy. It's like Christmas!

Sunday
Woke up late, looked at graduation pictures with parents. Went to church, wrote speech for Seminary graduation. Cleaned house, went to barbeque at Katie's house, watched some Sherlock there with Katie, her boyfriend Tom, Olivia, Mindy, Kelly, Ariel and Katie's sister Taryn. Ate food, talked, then went to Seminary graduation with Dad. Gave my talk - apparently it went well - ate a lot of food, went over to the end of Mom's last orchestra concert. Am now home and tired.

Tomorrow is Sherlock day. Woohoo!

My New Obsession

These guys. Or this show, I guess. It's BBC Sherlock. Modernization of Sherlock Holmes. Benedict Cumberbatch (how awesome of a name is that?) and Martin Freeman are Sherlock Holmes and John Watson. Basically, I'm totally in love with this show. It's hilarious. It's terrifying. It's intriguing. It's heartwarming. It's suspenseful. It has left me in stitches and has left me screaming with shock. I. Love. This. Show.

And then there's the whole Ho-Yay aspect of it... :D

Which of course overlaps with the whole fanart aspect...

Love love love love love.

Stuff I've Done Recently

1. Taken AP Stats test
2. Written letters to Aladdin
3. Turned in final projects
4. Finished with classes forever
5. Driven to the airport a lot
6. Eaten a lot of food
7. Gone to CU Singles Ward
8. Hung out with other seniors at a park
9. Watched The Two Towers with Hannah
10. Registered for first BYU class
11. Gotten burritos with Mr. Bingley
12. Watched Dr. Who with Mr. Bingley
13. Went to an awards assembly, which would have been boring if I hadn't been passing tons of notes
14. Had game night with girlfriends
15. Been pranked in Sherlock-related ways by said girlfriends
16. Gotten lunch with girlfriends, ate best veggie burger ever
17. More airport runs
18. Driven in more rain than ever before
19. Watched pilot episode of Sherlock
20. Loved the rain we've been having
21. Teased Mr. Bingley about his Hermione
22. Signed a lot of yearbooks
23. Decorated notebooks
24. Remembered I have a Twitter
25. Cleaned the house a lot

Wonderful, Wonderful Day

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and life is good! My day has been just downright fantastic.
PE: I ran my fastest mile ever - 8:40 - and got a 100% on my Presidential Fitness mile run exam. :D
Roots of Conflict: Hannah and I presented our final project on AIDS in Botswana, did awesomely, and then left to go make hot chocolate.
Orchestra: Went to PE again to make up missed classes, ran the mile again. Had a nice chat with Dr. Balthar, who's in that class.
Euro: Hannah and I worked on our final project: a poster of the Great Constants of European History, which I will post later.
English: Had nothing to do, so we did that thing where you write down something nice about everyone in the room.
Lunch: Got yearbooks.
Stats: Dr. Balthar taught class, and actually did a very good job. But I'm freaking out about the Stats test.
Study Hall: Aladdin and Dr. Balthar's freshman sister had me read a letter that Aladdin wrote me, which made me extremely happy. It's absolutely wonderful to hear from him. Then I went to PE again, lifted weights with a kid named Vaughn, argued about books with PE teacher, who has no appreciation for fantasy or sci-fi.
After school: Went to library, since house was being shown. Then came home for a couple minutes, then ran out the door again to scoot for another showing. Went to WalMart, remedied Ariel's wardrobe deficiencies, got dinner at King Soopers, came home for ten minutes, darted off to Hannah's house for Stats study with Hannah, her brother Andrew and her boyfriend Joon.

Am now very tired. Need to sleep.

A List

Things That Are Good
- Aladdin's brother, Dr. Balthar, just posted a note on Facebook on Aladdin's account as per Aladdin's request in a letter to him, and he says boarding school is better than expected!
- Yesterday, Ariel, Olivia and Allyson and I took Kelly to dinner for her birthday. On the way there, Olivia and I decided to blast the 1812 Overture with the windows down. It was AWESOME.
- I got a 5 on my practice AP Euro exam.
- I am slightly less sick today than I have been.
- I only have one more orchestra class until I'm free.
- I will get an A in PE without having to make stuff up.
- Allyson's decided to go to BYU!
- Hannah burned me a Dream Theater CD
- Food
- Chocolate ice cream
- I had my last Seminary class ever today.

History Has No Paragraph Breaks (Part 1)

In 1500, stuff started happening that the AP Euro exam could quiz us on. Europe was leaving the Dark Ages, or Middle Ages, or Medieval times or whatever the heck you want to call them. The Renaissance showed up, with all its Classical ideas, and suddenly a bunch of guys painted, sculpted, invented, wrote and thought of a lot of things. The general self-esteem of people inflated, and they started to think that humans were actually pretty cool, rather than sucking like they thought in the Middle Ages. Gutenberg invented this printing press and then everybody started reading. And that fueled the Protestant Reformation, which is what happened when Martin Luther sat through one too many masses that went waaay over schedule, and led half of Europe away from the Catholic church. Then Henry the VIII needed an heir, which he figured a new wife would provide him with (Of course, Henry! It's not *your* stinking sperm that keep producing daughters!), only Catholics weren't so hot about the divorce idea, so Henry started the Anglican church, which was bascially the Catholic Church but run by the English monarchy. And this whole religion thing really ticked everyone off, because some German princes were making it all political, and Europe fought the 30 Years War, in which a lot of people died and no one really gained anything. And there was a law that said that leaders could pick between Catholicism and Protestantism for their state's official religion. Also, Spain explored the New World and then had an Inquisition. France had some kings, and they got all into absolutism and the divine right of kings, and basically started to increase their power to the point where they ruled everything. Louis XIV was particularly good at this. A bunch of science guys (Bill Nye's predecessors) started a Scientific Revolution, and people decided that the Earth goes around the Sun, not round and round the garden like a teddy bear, and the Scientific Method really caught on, much to the dismay of 8th graders everywhere. Then some guys started thinking about economics, and invented mercantilism, which sent European nations into a scramble for colonies like a bunch of kindergarteners with a pinata.

(to be continued)

Lake Oswego

Romeo and Juliet - Dire Straits
I Still Ain't Over You - Augustana
Black Balloon - The Goo Goo Dolls
Song Unsung - Eden White
Uprising - Muse

What in the world connects those songs? They're on my iPod, but that's true of a lot of songs. They're all in common time, but so are a lot of songs.

They all were instrumental (ha, pun) in the creation of the story that I'm trying to write right now.

I have four narrators. Michael is a guardian angel. He lived on Earth around 1000 BC. He's a Slytherin. He guards another narrator, Marie Gregson, a girl who lives in Lake Oswego, Oregon. She's a Ravenclaw. One of her friends is Connor O'Donnell, who is another narrator. He's a Gryffindor. The final narrator, Kelly O'Donnell, is Connor's dead older sister. She's a Hufflepuff.

I'm very excited for this story. It's important to me.

Thoughts That Cross My Mind As I Work On Euro

1. I'm listening to the full Metropolis Pt. 2: Scenes From A Memory album by Dream Theater. I actually like it quite a bit. It's like Catholic mass - it's better when you can't tell what they're saying. Except for occasionally. But I like this rock opera better when I don't know what's going on, because I'm not nuts about the plot.
2. My history textbook can make even Hitler's rise to power boring.
3. Merlin just showed me Hipster Hitler. It's rather hilarious.
4. I am sick right now. My throat is killing me. This is many kinds of un-fun.
5. Dude, someone just died in this rock opera. After the yay-death-isn't-the-end song. What's up with that?
6. The motion-senor lights keep thinking I'm not here, and I have to wave my arms around ever 10 minutes or so.
7. Allergies are horrid.
8. I am bored. Bored. Bored!
9. I have 12 days of school left. 12. I'm so excited. And so un-motivated.
10. I've recently become totally obsessed with BBC's show, Sherlock. It's Sherlock Holmes in a modern setting, and is brilliant. Sherlock is a brilliant sociopath, and John Watson a military doctor returned from Afghanistan. It's hilarious, it's heartwarming, it's intense, it's brilliant, and I love it. And it doesn't exactly hurt that both leading men are very crush-able... ;)
11. Mr. Bingley gave me a CD with the song "Fields of Gold" by Sting on it. I quite like it.
12. AP Review books are much better than textbooks.

Mr. Bingley

Mr. Bingley is one of the best people I know. He's incredibly kind, and seems to be the very definition of long suffering. He puts up with more of my crap than anyone outside my family, and he's always there for me. He's funny, he's smart, he's loyal... I could go on and on.

But despite all his good qualities, he is a little delusional. He's under the delusion that he's not worth liking, when he so clearly is. Recently, many girls have told him that they think he's quite handsome, or that they had crushes on him, or that they currently have crushes on him. And the dear man is shocked.

One girl, in particular, he is quite flattered by. I think he's romantically inclined towards her, though he says he doesn't feel like they should date now. But still, I think this girl will need a name. I think I'll call her Paganini. She's a brilliant violinist.

Anyway, it's been good fun for me to watch him have some romance in his life. He says he's going to try to walk the fine line between dating and romance. I wish him luck. He'll need it.

Angels

Aladdin's gone. His parents have sent him to boarding school. Against his will. They gave him a few hours notice before they left. It's a boarding school with no phones, no internet, and no way to contact him.

We got to say goodbye on Facebook. But it wasn't enough. This is all so sudden. I wish I could help him, but I can't. No one should be sent away from their families against their will. But he has been. And now he's all alone.

I wish there were a way to communicate with him. But there's not.

So yeah. That's pretty much what been on my mind non-stop.

But in the other trivial affairs I should try to concentrate on:
- We've had house showings every day this week. Everyone is constantly on edge, freaked out about keeping the house clean, and stress levels are somewhere in the stratosphere. I do not like it.
- I'm working on my final English project, which is about how the wars authors experience affect how they portray war in their novels. I'm using the Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter as my case studies, but I might add some stuff about Battlestar Galactica, too.
- I'm annoyed that I'm not actually working on the aforementioned English project right now because I'm on a library computer, which doesn't have PowerPoint2007. I'm at the library because of the aforementioned house showings.
- I've really been in a Dire Straits mood recently.
- In Seminary today, we learned about angels. It was really interesting to me, since my novel is about angels.

If there's anyone who needs a guardian angel right now, it's Aladdin.

Also, I'm quite annoyed at Padme, for just skipping off into the sunset when the Genie, whose pain she caused, and Aladdin, who she professed to love, are in such bad states. I think it shows an appalling lack of empathy.

Days until AP Lit Test: 15
Days until AP Euro Test: 16
Days until AP Stats Test: 21
Days until Graduation: 31
Days until Deathly Hallows Part 2: 86

Currently: In Shock

Powerless

Aladdin's been waxing creative. He's taken to posting notes on Facebook, usually prose, but sometimes poetry, and almost always allegory for what he's thinking and feeling. This isn't actually what frustrates me - while I prefer a blog rather than Facebook notes, I'm all for creative mental unloading on the internet. What frustrates me is the responses he gets to his notes. Girls who don't know him terribly well will comment that his stuff is brilliant, and beautiful, and that they think he's a great artist. They fawn over the despair in the notes. Other kids will post stuff like "this is really cool, keep writing, man" or "dude sick", but they all have the same message: "Wow, I didn't know you could fake sadness like this well enough to write that." And that's what drives me crazy.
Aladdin's not writing them because he fancies himself the next Emily Dickinson. I seriously doubt he's writing them for the compliments he gets from Padme and her friends. I am fairly confident that he's writing them because he needs help. I believe that each time he posts one, he hopes that somehow, someone will understand that he's not just creatively making up the pain in the poems. And I don't think most people who read them understand that, or maybe they just don't want to.
It would be easier to not see the pain. It would be easier to accept the facade that he's frequently put up of a happy, cheerful, somewhat shallow guy who gets along with everyone than to look deeper and see the kid who's constantly at war with his own mind. And I wish I could point that out to all his Facebook-note fans, but I can't. It would be a betrayal of his confidence. And so I'm left powerless to help. And I wish I weren't.

Psychic

I hate being psychic sometimes.

That intro line sounds like something out of That's So Raven, a TV show which I haven't thought about in about seven years.

To my knowledge, I'm not actually psychic, but I do seem to be really good at predicting romantic happenings. A few months ago, I had a dream that the girl Dr. Baltar has been mad about for ages finally agreed to go out with him. The next week, she did (for a whopping two days before breaking up with him). The night before Aladdin broke up with me, I definitely had a feeling that he would (which I then ignored the next day - stupid me). Now, I've predicted the Genie's breakup with his girlfriend, who I'll call Padme(man, I've never had to use a codename for a girl on here before). Padme has always had a thing for Aladdin, but once I started dating Aladdin, she started dating the Genie, and seemed quite happy. But now that Aladdin's free, she's been paying him more attention, and I felt like she would soon leave the Genie. Well, she did. Last night. And I'm pretty peeved at her for hurting the Genie like she has.

Padme is a strange girl. She also dated Dr. Baltar, and does Nanowrimo like I do, shares my loathing of footwear, and reads xkcd. But despite those similarities, we're quite different. She's petrified of change, wheras I embrace it. She's a lot more passive than I am. And she's just plain wierder.

I sincerely hope not all my dreams involving my exes and who they like/who likes them are prophetic, because if that's true, our world will be like the world in the Lorax after they chop down all the truffula trees within the next few weeks. And I will become a PE training coach.

Always On My Mind

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going there... But I like it here, wherever it is."

I've loved this song ever since I first heard it when I was thirteen. It's just... always been beautiful.

There's a good story behind this song, I think. Apparently Elvis first sang it a while after divorcing his wife. But that's not really what I'm thinking of. I'm thinking that this would be a great song to write into a story I'm writing. And I think I've found a place for it in my current project. But I'm not certain.

From what I've heard from and observed of boys, this isn't real. They don't ever like a girl so much that she's always on their mind. They only think about one thing at a time, and we're rarely top priority. So we're not "always on their minds". But as girls, we can think of more than one thing at once, and it's quite possible for them to be always on our minds. Basically, we love them more than they can love us. And that sucks.

Mr. Bingley has pleaded that he doesn't think that is the case with all guys, and says he doesn't think that's the case with him. But I think he's wrong.

So yeah. Basically, I wish this song could be real.

I'm too tired to think of a title.

Stupid Things Aladdin has posted on Facebook recently: 

"I need someone who I can pass by in the hall and say: "hey there, sweetheart!" and then she would say: "you've had such a hard day, you should take a break and relax for a little while while I massage your lower back." And then I would say: "Really, you mean it?" To which she would respond: "You mean the world to me." I think everyone needs someone like that. It's just too bad that nobody actually acts like that :("

"I need a guardian angel."

Well, those are the two stupidest that are short enough to post here. But seriously. How much of an idiot can you be? 

I've bit back all the comments I might have left, but you, blog, are probably mildly curious as to what they are and polite enough to act interested. So to the guardian angel one, I could have commented:

"Oh, what gave you that idea?"

"Nooooo.... waaaay...."

"Hm, wonder where you could get one of those!"

"Too bad no one would ever be willing to do that for you."

"Your life is so hard! If only someone cared about you enough to try to help you through your sooo hard life!"

And to the longer one:

"Seriously. A lot of guys would kill for what you had."

"I wonder where you could get someone like that!"

"Any girl who would do that for you is to be pitied grievously."

"*cough* abusive relationship *cough*"

"lol"

But I didn't post any of those. 

They make me feel angry, and hurt, and unappreciated. They make me laugh at what an idiot he is. They make me roll my eyes at how self-centered and wimpy he is. 

This week is prom week. Thankfully, I'm not going to prom. There aren't words for how relieving I find this.

Good Things That Happened Recently

- Olivia got a full-ride to Duke

- I got a 100% on my stats test

- Mr. Bingley and I figured out his classes he's going to take next semester at BYU.

- Hannah and I watched the Fellowship of the Ring and played a Lord of the Rings drinking game with water.

- The Genie and I got to spend a while talking on my porch yesterday while it rained.

Bad Things That Happened Recently

- It snowed this morning.

- I had to listen to a bunch of prom drama I don't care about.

- An acquaintance confided in me and confessed that they're practicing very self-destructive behavior, which prompted a bunch of do-I-tell-and-save-them-from-themself-or-do-i-keep-my-promise-of-secrecy-and-remain-a-confidant? crisis. I kept my promise of secrecy in the end. I'm still extremely worried about this person.

- Allyson did not get on-campus housing at BYU.

So yeah. Life keeps happening, and I keep bumbling through.

Stuff Keeps Happening.

On Tuesday, my friend Allyson and I drove to BYU with her dad to check out the campus. She's Catholic, but is considering BYU for next year. We met up with my friend Megan, who goes to school there, and ate at the Cannon Center. After that, Megan took us to her dorm in Wyview, where Allyson would probably live. Then we came home and collapsed.

On Wednesday, we took a tour of campus. Then I met up with my friend Erika, who I hadn't seen in two years, and she showed me her dorm in Helaman Halls. It was great to see her! Then we drove back home. Driving is long and rather boring and I cannot stay awake on long road trips.

Today, I went to school. We did a webquest about genocide in Sudan during Roots of Conflict. In European History, we learned about eugenics and ate a lot of food (not related). We learned how to make cake in a microwave during Access, and then had AP administration during lunch. During Stats, we reviewed for tomorrow's test.

Prom drama. On Monday I wasn't going to any prom, and now I may be going to two. One to save Mr. Bingley from an awkward situation, and another to have happy senior memories with girlfriends or something. Which means dress shopping. Crap.

Also, Aladdin and his friend, who I will call the Genie, confuse me. On Sunday, the Genie told me that Aladdin and one of his friends were planning to sneak out of their houses in the night, drive to Wyoming, and cut down a tree, and bring it back to Colorado. Which is many different kinds of illegal. I told the Genie that I thought he should let Aladdin's parents know, and he did. The next day, the Genie told me that Aladdin had completely blown up at him for ratting him out, and that their lifelong-heterosexual-partnership was most likely over forever. But yesterday, Aladdin posted an I-love-you type thing on the Genie's wall on Facebook. So today I asked the Genie about it, and he says that Aladdin's been trying to make it up to him, and that Aladdin apologized and everything.

And I'm jealous. Aladdin never cared about me enough to apologize for anything, or try to regain my favor after he blew up at me. I'm... just sad, I guess, that I wasn't worth anything to him, really. I wish he would have cared enough to say sorry.

And I was watching Sam and Frodo in the Lord of the Rings in the car on Tuesday and Wednesday. Watching the piercing blue eyes grow sad, and desperate, begging the green eyes to help. Watching how Sam never left Frodo. And I kept thinking how I should have done more. I... I failed Aladdin. I should have been more like Sam.

"I made a promise, Mr. Frodo. A promise. Don't you lose him, Samwise Gamgee. And I don't mean to. I don't mean to."

I didn't mean to. But I did.

I remember "Song Unsung" by Eden White.

"I really like weekends too..."

This weekend has been quite lovely. On Friday it was warm, and I went to dinner with Olivia, Kelly, and Allyson. We met at Good Times, ate a ton of food, and then moseyed over to the Farmer's Market, where we wandered around and tried lotion samples and bought chocolate cinnamon bears. Then Olivia had to leave, and after sitting and talking some more, we tried to go to Kelly's house. That didn't work terribly well, since Kelly's car battery was dead, and her dad had to come give her a jumpstart. But we did make it back to her house after that, and we played videogames until I fell asleep.

On Saturday, Ariel and Mom and I went to the Rec Center before General Conference. Then we listened to the first session of Conference. In between the first and second sessions, we went to Hobby Lobby to find non-personal ways to decorate the house for showing and selling it. Then we listened to the second session of Conference. Then we made my senior poster, which we had to for school. :P My dad came home, and went to the Priesthood session of Conference. I talked to Allyson about a potential trip to BYU, and then went to bed.

Today, I've listened to General Conference and written the letter of appreciation that's required for my scholarship to BYU. Now I'm listening to the soundtrack from Les Choristes, and remembering how much I love that movie. But alas, I must scrounge up some food before the last session of Conference starts.

Important Stuff

Aladdin and I have sort of made up, I guess. I messaged him and apologized for all that I could think of that I had possibly done wrong. He didn't apologize back, but he said he wanted to be friends again. I had him define that, because we have very different ideas of what being friends means, but we are now back to where we were last semester - that is, we'll occasionally have conversations and be on good terms in general. I guess.

I've selected my room at BYU! I'm very excited.

I have a big Euro test tomorrow that I'm not ready for. Oh snap. Time to go study!

Monday: Jimmer, Genocide, Lizards, Matrix, Guacamole, etc.

Today was school. And coming to school after spring break was not fun.

It snowed this morning. I came from 89 degrees in Dallas, and it snowed! And was generally freezing. So I over-reacted, wore too many layers, and ended up removing a few in 2nd period.

In Seminary, we watched a video where the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve bore their testimonies of the Savior. Usually I think Seminary videos are super cheesy, but I actually quite liked this one. I guess I really like it when prophets bear testimony, rather than having bad actors deliver cheesy lines as they act out "real life" for us. Imagine that.

In PE, we had to do a bunch of fitness stations. I made the basketball one more fun by pretending to be Jimmer Fredette. I shot just like him. ;)

In Roots of Conflict, we talked about how nations heal after a genocide. The teacher started the class off with the question "If your neighbors killed your family, would you forgive them?" I responded that of course I could - I'd have to. It'd be hard, but in order to heal myself, I'd have to forgive them. I'm really grateful for all I've learned about forgiveness in church and in my real life. It makes life much better. And I'm glad that I know that this life isn't all we have - that it's really quite short in the eternal scheme. Becuase this genocide stuff would be a lot more depressing if I didn't know that this life isn't all that we've got.

We didn't do much in Orchestra. Shocker.

In Euro, we learned about the Russian Revolution, and all I could think about was the part in Annie where they talk about the Bolsheviks. Leapin' lizards!

English was discussion about final projects, the Matrix, and the book that no one's cracked open yet.

At lunch, my friend Mindy gave us her leftover chips and guacamole from Spanish class, and we made quick work of them. It was fun. We hadn't had a good just-girls-talking-and-food lunch in a while.

There was a substitute in Stats, so we quickly worked on a worksheet and then sat around talking, which was nice.

In Study Hall, Allyson and I talked college for a while, and then had fun googling our religions.

This afternoon I went to the Rec Center with my mom, and found a weight machine that cracks my back. I'm very excited.

I've been going between a sort of "Gives You Hell" by the All-American Rejects approach to Aladdin and an apathetic, moving on kind of deal. With the occasional "woo-hoo freedom!" cry. But I think I'm finding a middle ground - sort of the "kill him with kindness" philosophy. Kind of. Basically, be kind to him, and be happy, and still enjoy the occasional "Gives You Hell" sing-along. But I still have to figure out if I should/how to have a reconciliatory talk with him.

Now off to go study for those upcoming tests... how many days until I graduate?

Louisiana Part 4

Friday
I got to sleep in... again! Ariel shadowed at River Oaks, a private school with no uniforms (definitely a plus). We looked at more houses, and we met with a Neville High School counselor again.
That night, Sarah Katherine, Madelyn and Emily took Ariel and I out to Rawz, which was really really fun, and then we drove around to a park, but saw that there were motorcycle guys there so we decided to go back to Madelyn and Emily's house, where we played on the trampoline. The Monroe girls found out that Ariel is synesthetic, and had lots of fun asking her about that.

Saturday
Got up and packed. We stopped by the Monroe Athletic Club on our way out, and it looks quite fantastic. I'll definitely have to go there a lot if people continue to feed me.
We drove to the Dallas/Fort Worth Airport, and waited for our flight, drank milkshakes, and then flew to Denver. Denver looks so brown and dead after Monroe, but it's wonderful to have the mountains again. Also, it's cold here. :(

Louisiana Part 3

Monday (cont.)
After falling asleep, a few people from the ward here took us to dinner at an Asian fusion place. Sarah Katherine was the only other person my age there - I like her a lot. She's super friendly and fun to be around. Then they took us to a place called Orange Leaf for frozen yogurt, which was exactly like Red Mango in Colorado.

Tuesday
We drove 30 minutes west to the next town over, Ruston. Ariel and I went to Seminary there, and had an entire lesson about marriage. I haven't had many of those in Seminary. Then Ariel went to be a shadow at Cedar Creek, a tiny private school, and Mom and Dad and I went house hunting. We found one house that reminded my mom of Connecticut that she and I both liked, but we still have yet to find a house we love. House hunting definitely gets boring after a while - I'll never be a real estate agent.
We met with people from Cedar Creek, and then drove around and looked at houses more. A Mormon family from Ruston invited us over for dessert to talk about moving to Louisiana, since they moved down here from New Jersey last year. Thier oldest daughter, Alise, was Ariel's age, and was quite amiable.

Wednesday
I got to sleep in this morning! Mom and Dad took Ariel to St. Frederick's, the local Catholic school to shadow, and then we house hunted later in the day. We found a few houses that were nice, but they're way far away from everything else. We picked Ariel up from St. Fredericks, and while we were in the meeting with their principal, I found out that I got a scholarship to BYU! That was very exciting. After we drove around and looked at more houses, a woman from church and her daughter (one year younger than me) took my family to dinner, and then to Mutual. For Mutual, we mostly sat around and talked, but also flew kites by the river. It was really fun, and I really like all the girls in YWs here. They're all so friendly, and fun, and they seem a lot more close-knit than the YW in my ward back home. It's nice.

Thursday
Another morning to sleep in! I worked on some homework, and then we drove to Ruston again so that Ariel could visit Ruston High School. While in Ruston, we looked at some more houses, and then met with the school counselor at Ruston High. Then we drove back to Monroe, went to Walmart, and have returned home for now, until we go to Sarah Katherine's house to watch the BYU Basketball game and eat dinner.

So that's what's been going on. I miss my bed. It's much more comfortable than the bed Ariel and I have to share here. And Ariel's a bit of a blanket hog, and apparently I am too, so it'll be better when I'm back in my own bed. But I don't want to leave the warmth and green of this place. I feel like it's summer here, since I haven't been in school and it's so warm. I don't want to go back to two more months of school and cold... :(

But I do miss my friends. Ugh. Conflicted.

I was thinking today about the Aladdin deal when I was listening to a song by Relient K - Which To Bury, Us Or The Hatchet?. I think it would be nice and easy to just not speak to him again and then just move to Louisiana and go to BYU without ever seeing him again. But it'd also be cowardice. And I don't want to take the easy way out. I want to do the right thing, the thing that takes bravery, and guts,  and hotheadedness, and whatever else it is that we Gryffindors have.

- Many hours later -

I just got back from Sarah Katherine's house. We ate a ton of food and watched the BYU Basketball game. I had never watched a basketball game before, but it was exciting. It was hilarious to hear a lady older than my mom shout at the TV "You just got Jimmered!".

I still don't know what to do about the whole Aladdin-hates-me-and-never-wants-to-speak-to-me-again-but-I-don't-want-to-leave-on-a-bad-note situation. Sigh.